Fighting for Our Friendships: The Science and Art of Conflict and Connection in Women's Relationships (Hardcover)
Why are women's friendships so deep yet so fragile? Friendship coach and educator Danielle Bayard Jackson unpacks the latest research about women's cooperation and communication, while sharing practical strategies to preserve and strengthen these relationships.
Fighting for Our Friendships is one part textbook, one part handbook. Readers will not only learn what the latest research has to say about the mechanics of women's friendships, but they'll walk away with real-life solutions for the most common conflicts that arise in their platonic relationships.
Using a combination of psychology, science, narrative, and a few of the author's signature scripts and out-of-the-box exercises, readers will learn:
- The three "affinities" that bring women together (and tear them apart)
- Scripts to navigate nine of the most challenging "friend types" (and how to know which one you are)
- The covert strategies women use to hurt each other (and how to avoid them)
- How to have a hard conversation with a friend (without losing the friendship)
- Surprising ways that women's people-pleasing delays platonic intimacy (and how to stop it)
- How to know if a friendship is worth saving (and what to do to recover)
- How to make (and deepen!) connections with other women
In a time when we are often encouraged to opt out of friendships at any sign of friction, Danielle Bayard Jackson is showing us how to opt in.
Before she began coaching women across the country, Danielle worked as a high school teacher and spent time as an academic department chair in the eighth largest county in the United States. She now uses her education background to deliver practical, research-based strategies for women who are looking for ways to create and maintain healthy female friendships. Her ability to speak to women in various life stages has contributed to the growing popularity of her business, Friend Forward and podcast of the same name.
“Danielle Bayard Jackson takes female friendship seriously and examines the multi-faceted way that two people who love each other can sometimes reach a painful crossroads, leaving us heartbroken, confused, and defeated. Best of all, she offers hope for those of us looking for a path forward. This book celebrates all that is glorious, maddening, vivifying, and nurturing about friendships, and I will be passing it along to all my BFFs.”—Christie Tate, author of the New York Times bestseller Group: How One Therapist and a Circle of Strangers Saved My Life and B.F.F.: A Memoir of Friendship Lost & Found
“Fighting For Our Friendships is essential reading for anyone looking to diagnose and address universal hiccups in adult friendships. Danielle’s warm, highly relatable writing will make you feel like you’re engaged in a one-on-one coaching session with her. Her thoughtful advice and carefully researched suggestions will not only make you a more confident friend when conflicts arise, but also a more compassionate, nurturing friend too.”—Anna Goldfarb, called the "New York Times’ friendship correspondent" and author of Modern Friendship: How to Nurture Our Most Valued Connections”
“If you're stalled or struggling in your friendships (and who isn't?), look no further. Sage and supportive, Danielle Bayard Jackson leads you to the more authentic, fulfilling friendships you’ve been searching for. Packed with revelatory tips and scripts, Fighting for Our Friendships is your essential guidebook to sustaining and strengthening your most precious relationships.”—Ellen Hendriksen, PhD, author of How to Be Yourself: Quiet Your Inner Critic and Rise Above Social Anxiety
“Danielle has unlocked the secrets to transforming your relationships from merely okay to truly remarkable: Take stock, gain clarity, shed old patterns, and embrace fresh perspectives. All you need to revolutionize your connections awaits is here for you in this pivotal guide.”—Elizabeth Cutler, Co-Founder of SoulCycle and Peoplehood